The news! : a drinking game
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The news! : a drinking game
*NOTE!* I did not make this up I found it in a brilliant little book titled do it
here are the rules.
Any number of persons assemble in a room with the TV showing a news programme or news channel. The group should be mixed gender but it can be all one gender if you'd prefer it that way. A large quantity of alcohalic drink should be assembled ( bought or stolen) in advance- including beer, vodka champagne etc. Each person starts with a bobttle or can of beer. other drinks are served as neccessary. Paying close attention to the news broadcasts follow the instructions below. If the news ends change channel and find some more news. The game ends when the last person cannot drink anymore or when there are no more news broadcasts to be watched whichever is the sooner. - the fun insues in the next post -
here are the rules.
Any number of persons assemble in a room with the TV showing a news programme or news channel. The group should be mixed gender but it can be all one gender if you'd prefer it that way. A large quantity of alcohalic drink should be assembled ( bought or stolen) in advance- including beer, vodka champagne etc. Each person starts with a bobttle or can of beer. other drinks are served as neccessary. Paying close attention to the news broadcasts follow the instructions below. If the news ends change channel and find some more news. The game ends when the last person cannot drink anymore or when there are no more news broadcasts to be watched whichever is the sooner. - the fun insues in the next post -
for any mention of a royal family - all take one sip
for the death of any member of a royal family - all drink a whole can down in one
for the mention of a famine - all remove an item of clothing
*
for any mention of eco-disaster - girls drink a shot of tequila
(two shots for a nuclear spillage)
for a threatened strike or industrial action - boys take one drink
for an actual strike or industrial action - boys take two drinks
*
for a missing child or teenager - all take one drink
for a missing child or teenager confirmed as murdered - all take two drinks
for a missing child or teenager found safe and unharmed - all remove an item of clothing
*
for an ironic expression, quizzical look or raised eyebrow from the newsreader - boys remove their underpants
for a politician facing sexual scandal - girls remove their underpants
for a scientific breakthrough - all drink a shot of vodka
*
for the reformation of a legendary pop group or comeback from a solo star - one drink
for a stock market crash - everyone puts back on an item of clothing
*
for a report on extreme weather (heatwave, storms, blizzards, floods) - all take off an item off someone else's clothing
anytime the following acronyms are used; EEC, NAACP, BBC, NASA or MI5 - take three drinks
for a bombing, hijack, execution or other terrorist atrocity - everyone puts on an item of someone else's clothes
*
anytime a black person is mentioned outside the context of sports, entertainment, drugs or weapons offences - all drink a bottle of champagne
for an item on the spice girls or other supposedly nubile girl pop sensation - everybody masturbate
for an item in which the word history is mentioned - one minutes silence
*
for a celebrity divorce - girls kiss the boys
for a celebrity marriage - boys kiss the girls
for a satellite link up - one vodka
*
for any footage labeled as 'amateur video' - all drink a pernod
for any footage labeled as 'reconstruction' - all drink a pernod
for a mass grave - all drink two pernods
*
for a politician who reads a preprepared statement and then refuses to answer questions - boys show their arses
for a camera closing in on someone as they start to weep - two drinks
for a newsreader having trouble with the autocue - all drink a quarter bottle of gin
*
for a temporary problem with the sound - the girls kiss the girls
for a temporary problem with the picture - the boys kiss the boys
for a complete blackout or unexpected loss of pictures and sound - one minutes silence
*
for an item on car jacking, road rage or other traffic related criminal behavior - mix a margherita but don't drink it
for an item on green issues - drink the margherita
*
for a kid in a coma - one drink
for a kid coming out of a coma - two drinks
for a life support machine switched off - three drinks
for a nail bomb - black coffee
*
for an item on the origin of the universe - the boys go down on the person to their left
for an item on the death of the universe - the girls go down on the person to their right
*
for an interview or broadcast from a public place where bystanders are visible in the background
i) staring at the camera or looking curious - take one drink
ii) pulling faces or waving - take two drinks
iii) making abusive V signs - take three drinks
iv) exposing their arses - take four drinks
*
for any politician wearing glasses - one drink
for any politician wearing a tie - two drinks
*
for a map, animation or complex three-D graphic - three drinks
for a cat stuck up a tree - open a bottle of champagne
*
for tears at a press conference - two drinks
for a community spokesperson - two drinks
for a violent revolution anywhere in Europe - two drinks
*
for a newsreader that adopts a sick-making 'sensitive', grave or serious tone after a supposedly moving story - everyone silent for one minute
*
for a phone poll or crisis hotline - drink a gin and tonic
for any mention of GM foods - drink a gin and tonic
for footage of men or women in spacesuits - drink gin and tonic, take off an item of clothing and kiss the person to the left
*
for a pie chart - one drink
for a male celeb seen walking in a hail of paparazzi flashes - two drinks
for any instance of the words 'no comment' - drink a bottle down in one
*
for a churchman or churchwoman talking about morality - boys fuck the person to their left
for a politician talking about gays - girls suck off the person to their left
for an armed siege on a city housing estate/project - two cans of lager
for a newsreader that deploys an original as-yet-unheard of pronunciation of a 'foreign' name (of a person, a country, a political faction or other group) - three bottles of lager down in one|
for the death of any member of a royal family - all drink a whole can down in one
for the mention of a famine - all remove an item of clothing
*
for any mention of eco-disaster - girls drink a shot of tequila
(two shots for a nuclear spillage)
for a threatened strike or industrial action - boys take one drink
for an actual strike or industrial action - boys take two drinks
*
for a missing child or teenager - all take one drink
for a missing child or teenager confirmed as murdered - all take two drinks
for a missing child or teenager found safe and unharmed - all remove an item of clothing
*
for an ironic expression, quizzical look or raised eyebrow from the newsreader - boys remove their underpants
for a politician facing sexual scandal - girls remove their underpants
for a scientific breakthrough - all drink a shot of vodka
*
for the reformation of a legendary pop group or comeback from a solo star - one drink
for a stock market crash - everyone puts back on an item of clothing
*
for a report on extreme weather (heatwave, storms, blizzards, floods) - all take off an item off someone else's clothing
anytime the following acronyms are used; EEC, NAACP, BBC, NASA or MI5 - take three drinks
for a bombing, hijack, execution or other terrorist atrocity - everyone puts on an item of someone else's clothes
*
anytime a black person is mentioned outside the context of sports, entertainment, drugs or weapons offences - all drink a bottle of champagne
for an item on the spice girls or other supposedly nubile girl pop sensation - everybody masturbate
for an item in which the word history is mentioned - one minutes silence
*
for a celebrity divorce - girls kiss the boys
for a celebrity marriage - boys kiss the girls
for a satellite link up - one vodka
*
for any footage labeled as 'amateur video' - all drink a pernod
for any footage labeled as 'reconstruction' - all drink a pernod
for a mass grave - all drink two pernods
*
for a politician who reads a preprepared statement and then refuses to answer questions - boys show their arses
for a camera closing in on someone as they start to weep - two drinks
for a newsreader having trouble with the autocue - all drink a quarter bottle of gin
*
for a temporary problem with the sound - the girls kiss the girls
for a temporary problem with the picture - the boys kiss the boys
for a complete blackout or unexpected loss of pictures and sound - one minutes silence
*
for an item on car jacking, road rage or other traffic related criminal behavior - mix a margherita but don't drink it
for an item on green issues - drink the margherita
*
for a kid in a coma - one drink
for a kid coming out of a coma - two drinks
for a life support machine switched off - three drinks
for a nail bomb - black coffee
*
for an item on the origin of the universe - the boys go down on the person to their left
for an item on the death of the universe - the girls go down on the person to their right
*
for an interview or broadcast from a public place where bystanders are visible in the background
i) staring at the camera or looking curious - take one drink
ii) pulling faces or waving - take two drinks
iii) making abusive V signs - take three drinks
iv) exposing their arses - take four drinks
*
for any politician wearing glasses - one drink
for any politician wearing a tie - two drinks
*
for a map, animation or complex three-D graphic - three drinks
for a cat stuck up a tree - open a bottle of champagne
*
for tears at a press conference - two drinks
for a community spokesperson - two drinks
for a violent revolution anywhere in Europe - two drinks
*
for a newsreader that adopts a sick-making 'sensitive', grave or serious tone after a supposedly moving story - everyone silent for one minute
*
for a phone poll or crisis hotline - drink a gin and tonic
for any mention of GM foods - drink a gin and tonic
for footage of men or women in spacesuits - drink gin and tonic, take off an item of clothing and kiss the person to the left
*
for a pie chart - one drink
for a male celeb seen walking in a hail of paparazzi flashes - two drinks
for any instance of the words 'no comment' - drink a bottle down in one
*
for a churchman or churchwoman talking about morality - boys fuck the person to their left
for a politician talking about gays - girls suck off the person to their left
for an armed siege on a city housing estate/project - two cans of lager
for a newsreader that deploys an original as-yet-unheard of pronunciation of a 'foreign' name (of a person, a country, a political faction or other group) - three bottles of lager down in one|
- Silent Frog
- Posts: 842
- Joined: Sat May 05, 2007 12:00 am
- Location: Bristol/Norwich, UK
Lovely, I'm sure. Any chance you could post it in the Bullshit forum next time instead of General though? Not saying it is bullshit, I'm quite partial to drinking games. I bumped into a friend the other day who had just played a version of said game to the sunday omnibus of dreary English soap opera 'Eastenders' where everytime family is mentioned, a finger of drink is drunk. By family, this means the word 'family' and term relating to a family member such as 'mother' or 'brother'. It is fair to say that when I spoke to him some four hours after partaking in this activity, he was swaying quite impressively.
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